Freaking out over what feels like a lump on the back of my tongue??? Help

sarahsmith's picture

Ok so I admit I am a hypocondriac when it comes to my health, odd considering the whole bulimia side.

I have been suffering lately with what I would describe as a feeling of having flem at the top of my throat, very back of my mouth. It is something that I think has come up a few times before but Im also stressing that that is just in my head.

So what I thought was an annoying bit of flem, sorry know it sounds grose, something that I havent been able to clear, like cant swollow it, I drink water and it still doesnt go away, I have now possible discovered that it may be a lump on the back of my tongue, or in my throat, I dont know. Freaking out, as being a hypocondriac I immediately think I have cancer so of course am googling like hell to try and find out what it is. Is this something that can be caused by bulimia? I havent been sick now for 6 days, so surely if it was swelling by I dont know irritation from my fingers being back there, then surely that would have gone down because I havent been sick.????

Something I have found from googling is that we do have lumps at the back of our tongue called circumvallate papillae, but from panic I have now felt back there and one feels larger than the others, mayb this is what is causing the feeling like I have something caught in my throat, its annoying every time i swollow its all i can feel.

So now im like omg do I have cancer and i really need to go to the doctor, but Ive already established im not ready to go to my doctor to talk about my bulimia yet. But if i go to the doctor about this, when he looks at the back of my mouth will he be able to tell that I am bulimic??? I mean I havent been sick for nearly a week, but have been bulimic for over 8 years, i dont know does scarring occur or ahhhhh im freaking out. I dont want to talk about my bulimia but i am so panicking over what this lump is and this feeling that I cant clear my throat I really want to go to the doctor. As if i do have cancer then i need to go to the doctor asap, but then the other half of me thinks well if i wait a month and dont be sick for a month then the tell tale signs that i am bulimic will hopefully reduce and so he wont talk about that and will just talk about what this lump is?

Ahhhhhhhhh please i am freaking out, dont know what to do, is this nothing and is something connected with the bulimia??? Has anyone had this???

Thanks for your help and advice Xxxxxx

4 comments

min
min's picture
Offline
Joined: 25 Oct 2009
this seemed scary and u have

this seemed scary and u have to go to the doctor.. I know how hard it is to tell that u have bulimia and when I told my doctor for about 1 month ago that I have bulimia I felt like Im not ready to tell it, too.
I told her that I b/p and she knew quickly that I have bulmia. So u dont have to worry. Just go there and say it and if u requered that u told ur doctor then change ur doctor or dont go to him anymore..

alexi
alexi's picture
Offline
Joined: 30 Aug 2009
its probbly nothing to worry

its probbly nothing to worry about... but you should go to your doctor. it may also help to get a full body check up, if its available to you.
i also feel like im going to die or have cancer alot of the time. i write letters prbably once a weeks telling my family i love them... just in case i never wake up. i feel silly and its quite extreme, having these though is so horrible. they are stonger when iv been in a binge/purge zone for a while because i realise now the damage i could be doing.... but your not alone.
go to your doctor so he/she can help you calm down and explain thing to you.
you may never be ready to explain your bulimia to your doctor, but, for your own health and to ease your mind, you should. they wont judge and they can only help. i was not ready to tell my doctor but i did (felt unsafe at the time but that soon passed) and i can say only positive things have come from it.
i am soon going to get a full body check up so im not always wondering 'what if' or 'i cant possibly be healthy'. these disturbing thoughts have to dissapear. it may be extreme to othes but they feel so real its damaging.
good luck and take care in what er you do. x

Start to see yourself as a soul with a body rather than a body with a soul.

alexi
alexi's picture
Offline
Joined: 30 Aug 2009
its probbly nothing to worry

its probbly nothing to worry about... but you should go to your doctor. it may also help to get a full body check up, if its available to you.
i also feel like im going to die or have cancer alot of the time. i write letters prbably once a weeks telling my family i love them... just in case i never wake up. i feel silly and its quite extreme, having these though is so horrible. they are stonger when iv been in a binge/purge zone for a while because i realise now the damage i could be doing.... but your not alone.
go to your doctor so he/she can help you calm down and explain thing to you.
you may never be ready to explain your bulimia to your doctor, but, for your own health and to ease your mind, you should. they wont judge and they can only help. i was not ready to tell my doctor but i did (felt unsafe at the time but that soon passed) and i can say only positive things have come from it.
i am soon going to get a full body check up so im not always wondering 'what if' or 'i cant possibly be healthy'. these disturbing thoughts have to dissapear. it may be extreme to othes but they feel so real its damaging.
good luck and take care in what er you do. x

Start to see yourself as a soul with a body rather than a body with a soul.

Miss H
Miss H's picture
Offline
Joined: 20 Sep 2009
actually there's not that

actually there's not that much cancer associated with bulimia. it surprised me a bit to be honest. but it's not like smoking where unnatural things are going into your body.
the lump is probably something like a swollen gland or something.
also i find that if i have a good few days i start to feel worse sometimes. i get these really bad headaches- not sure why and my face goes all puffy.
as the other say it would probably be worth going to the doctor. if you're nervous then write it down and give it to your doctor. they are there to help you and will have seen people with bulimia before- and hopefully they can help you in case of any longer term problems like with your bones. and maybe even make life easier for you now. sometimes just talking to someone about all this can really help

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