it is getting worse and worse

adrienne's picture

I have binged and purged multiple times a day several times a week for the last 2 weeks and i feel so horrible. it has gotten BAD. i even called in sick to work this morning because i binged so bad last night and this morning. So i took a bunch of laxatives and am home allowing them to ravage my body. how sad and sick is that. =( to top it off i binged and threw up again while at home. so now it is early afternoon and i vow to let this be the last day. i can't let myself hurt my body or leave people who depend on me suffer because i am not there because i have my head in the toilet. =(
Any advice on how to stop this would be greatly appreciated. i don't know how to get back on track. i feel horrible all around.

4 comments

anna999
anna999's picture
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Joined: 18 Mar 2009
i have also vowed to let this

i have also vowed to let this be my last day. if it helps maybe we can try to be accountability buddies? ive never tried that but its worth a shot! xxx good luck hun

ucfknightsgirl
ucfknightsgirl's picture
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Joined: 23 Apr 2009
I'm in the same boat.

I've been on the downhill lately and i am ready to take back my life and my body as well.

The most i can tell you is that once you start eating "normally" it gets easier. Self control is like any muscle and as soon as you start to exercise self control the stronger yours will be.

Hope things go well for you!

kellster27
kellster27's picture
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Joined: 27 Feb 2009
I am two weeks off the boat too...but recommitted!

Two weeks of just throwing in the towel on recovery and I have finally found my way back to the site that started me down the great road I started when I joined here in February.
I got a little bit ahead of myself, started slacking on the structured meals that I was so proud of adhering to, and BAM! just like that just right back in the throes...

Well, I am over that. I'm back to my reasons for wanting to be back on track and really refocusing myself and preparing myself to be successful. This time I know what to expect- the swollen glands, the bloating, the digestive issues, but I am setting myself up for success and creating accountability everywhere I can.

I just chopped up a bunch of healthy veggies for salads & meals this week, have started my journal back up and am making it a point to stay away from booze, triggering people, and situations.

I can do this!! We can do this Adrienne!!1

Kellie

kachina
kachina's picture
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Joined: 7 Mar 2009
just remember we have all

just remember we have all gone into that deep dark spiral and feel like death would be easier...and we come out of it. you will come back out, and you will nourish yourself and be back on track.. you will. we have all done this hell and back thing, it is a learning process and a highly addictive release, so hang in there and don't think it will last 4ever...it won't. you will be fine.

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