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Richy's Recovery Tips
Shop for food using a list and perhaps with a friend and do not carry more money than you need or credit cards. Avoid shopping when hungry or likely to binge.
Community Tweets
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Slten2 Time to try and sleep! Night all and have a great day to everyone in a different time zone!! 2 min ago |
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Slten2 » Tiddles665 Yup you know what you should do! Just have a light lunch if really not hungry. 11 min ago |
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Tiddles665 » Slten2 Only problem is, I don't feel hungry :/ but I know i should get something, Urgh 14 min ago |
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Slten2 » Tiddles665 Yes you should definatley have lunch! You need to fuel that body. X 16 min ago |
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Tiddles665 Should I get lunch or not =/ Umm i hate this part 18 min ago |
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Has. Hope. » freemotion Hey Susan (= I'm 16 and live in north Carolina, woot! Haha things are getting better everyday. I've been having a lot of "off" days lately but I'm really really trying to recover. How are things going for you? Are you new to the site? 28 min ago |
Group chat
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- SPENDING ALL YOUR MONEY ON FOOD?
- Bulimic getting her first personal bathroom. Potential problem?
- Medication for my ed and depression?
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- ANYONE HERE GET AN ADRENALINE RUSH FROM B/P?
- Gynecological exam? First time! Help?
- After the binge: what can you do to recover your body?
- binge dream
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Bulimia does not help with weight loss and is not effective for weight control
See bulimia myths
Ali Kerr
Co Founder Bulimia Help
Recovery is possible!
If 1200 calories can be retained by the body every b/p, then why does the body go into starvation mode? Especially if you're b/p ing a few times a day..? thanks
it's strange how the body works. but basically there is no predictable way that it will work. so sometimes, even if you are bingeing, then the time you are starving means that you are messing up your metabolism.
I know this sounds weird but I am going to post this in my bathroom as a reminder when I feel the urge
Its true look how they shine for you
look how they shine for you
look how they shine for you
look how they shine for you
look how they shine for you
look how they shine
look at the stars look how they shine for you
Because bulimia makes your life hell... it steals your spirit and steals away your enjoyment from all sorts of things!
You are so right. I am just now realizing that my poor mood and lack of energy may be the result of years of bulimia. I just put two and two together tonight.
I have to agree with the earlier poster that said vomiting in public bathrooms is a reason to quit.
For me, the top three reasons are:
1. The act of vomiting is disgusting to me
2. I spend far too much money on the b/p cycle
3. My mood will be greatly enhanced by quiting
Thank you. That helped me a lot; you are absolutely right.
A constant battle
because things are not clear, life no longer unfolds, it is only controlled by bulimia.
because it severs the natural connection to our bodies, our only bodies, precious receptive loyal and helpful bodies.
because it adds to a dishonest way of life, adds to pain and suffering which is overabundant in our world as is.
because it does,
stifle and confuse us, make us angry and discouraged, distracted and unavailable.
ur right. i just hate what its made me - a lyer. in any other aspect of my life im loyal and will do the right thing. hate it hate it!!
No one understands how I hate it. It has destroyed every relationship I have. Despite how much I loathe it, I want to binge and purge right now. Horrible. I feel horrible.
A constant battle
I love how everything you stated was so precise and hit the spot. It also lies to our friends, confuses them, then loses them...
That was really helpful, thanks =)
wow this is so well said! It really is a dishonest life...bulimia. You are hiding so much of your own personal truth and lying to others hide your shame. So true!!! Best anyone has ever described what it is really like
“I laugh, I love, I hope, I try, I hurt, I need, I fear, I cry. And I know you do the same things too, So we're really not that different, me and you.”
The only way to quit is if you doing it for you. Quitting for other people is bad cause when they leave you, you'll go right back. You gotta know that you must live for you
The mirror does not see the person inside
bulimia causes you to lie and makes you secretive and deceptive, it destroys and hurts your most intimate relationships and friendships. it prevents you from being a good friend and takes time away from your relationships. ( a little redundant) you can also loose trust and respect, i know i have, but i have also gained it back.
jessica
It really does take over your life!!!
to not be tired, angry, frustrated, bloated, bad skin, lol the list goes on. it seems all so plain out there when im writing it down.
total waste of money. I love spending half the cash I make only to throw it all up later.
i hate feeling bloated full of air. Also when i manage to 'be good' ie not purge for a couple of meals, my digestive system isnt working properly. this may sound gross but i just cant go to the loo and end up constipated and bloated and feeling fatter and more lethargic than ever. Anyone else do this?
i'd get terrible gas pains after i'd eat too and feel bloated. and in the beginning when you start the refeeding process your bowel movements are irregular. when i wasn't eating right i'd feel weak and lethargic, naucious, and faint all the time. it gets better over time.
jessica
yes, all the time....i ahte it hate it hate it! the gas builds up and i use laxatives, jsut anything to get rid of the feeling. i hate this!
Yeah i do that - then i just take laxertives to sort it out - but then wish i hadn't because of the pain it causes me !!
:-) xx
Hey I have this exact same problem
After ive been b/p alot, wheni actually dodecide to have a nice, proper healthy meal, i get really bloated and then i start asking myself was it really worth having that meal because i cant stand the feeling of being bloated etc
Dont worry i just go to sleep and by the time i wake up, the feeling is totally gone:)
Its just your body trying to get used to the new way of dealing with food.
yes! ME! i do haha. i am going through that right now because i havent thrown up in almost 3 days, it always does this and it sucks! i had to take tums haha. i think it is just the body's way of getting use to digesting food, maybe, hopefully...
the sun comes out
* Because bulimia controls your life
* It destroys your social life
* It makes you feel like crap every now and then.
* Prevents you from having normal relations.
* Your mood changes very fast (and unpredictably)
In short, living with bulimia is not living.
Binging and purging the food you took the time to eat is straight up stupid.
-money that went towards the purchase of that food is wasted, and therefore food that could have actaully benefited by your loved one, or a starving homeless child on the streets is wasted. you get angry with your self and stress out more because you've wasted so much money on a horrible habit
-it makes you liar, you have to sneak around and act all stealth around your relative so you won't get caught
-it tears at you physically, acid that comes up with the vomit gradually burns away at your throat and sphincter that holds food in place in your stomach, you get gas, feel bloated
-it tears at you psychologically provides with false sense of control, when your underlying emotional stressors still reap at you.
because in the end your still feel the sad, apprehensiveness, helplessness, and worthless
although you still are no proving nothing to anyone, you still continue are able to slowly hurt yourself
it is foolish to put yourself in a situation with the knowledge that the situation will bring you and your loved ones pain and suffering. Although bulimia may provide things like relief from anxiety, desired weight loss, and sense of power and control...when it comes down to it these are all short term pleasures that soon fade. bulimia causes pain and suffering to bulimics and everyone they care about, and strains society as a whole. this is why its so stupid
bulimia is one of the worst ways to try(and fail) to lose weight. It slows your metabolism durastically and only makes you gain or flucuate. everyone get off the beaten path and start eating regular meals! I know, I know, easier said than done!
because I dont want to die of esophagus cancer
because I want to complete an iron man
because i am sick of spending money on food because I go crazy and eat it all
because I hate feeling out of control.
Because I have a daughter now and its my turn to set an example - I want it to be a good one. :-)
I want to travel to Europe on anthropological digs, fall in love with someone without having to keep secrets from them or hurt them with my actions, and live at peace with myself.
oxox Tina
You said it! I want to be simply happy...
because I want to (1) get my crossfit certification and (2) compete in fitness and obstacle courses again and possibly powerlifting..which is kinda hard if you are worn out and depleted from purging
change is progress
Because I have to prove to myself once and for all, that I have control over my body. Some feel that throwing up IS their way of having control...but trying to stop, soooo much more difficult. It's the new year, and it's time to stop this.
To have honest relationships. NO SECRETS.
Bulimia is like a jail. You feel lonely, angry and like your in hell. Your family, your body and yourself suffers so much. You spend every single day, hour, minute and second obsessing over food and your weight and askind yourself when it will end. Bulimia has taken so much from me, and i wont let it drain my energy. It feels like being in an abusive relationship
The mirror does not see the person inside
because
- i have no idea who i am without the desease (and THAT is sad)
- because i have been bulimic since i was 14, i don't have any idea what I look like (not sure if that makes sense)
- because hiding your smile due to disgusting teeth should not be an issue at 23
- because my husband doesn't deserve the moodswings
- because the one thing you want (control) is the first thing you lose when you give up the fight against it
- because i used to be invincible and now i am afraid of people
- because i want to not hate everything and everyone anymore
Tina
1. First and foremost you lose your health
2. On the shallow (disease talking side) it can make you gain weight
3. It alienates you from family and friends
4. It makes you dumber.....(see what I mean?)
5. I have already had three root canals....yeah!
6. Big waste of money
7. The guilt (aka....starving children in Ethiopia)
8. You waste soooooo much time that could be spent doing actual "productive" things in your life
9. The excuses/ sneakiness
10. The looks....god....those suck
11. hello?....we could die from this....not the legacy that I want to leave....(vain insanity)
12. the regret
13. The pain you cause your loved ones
14. The gastritis...that sucks...hello Nexium for life..
15. Not being emotionally "there" during conversations/lectures/movies/whatever because your mind is preoccupied with food/weight
......thats a good start
1 basic reason to quit:
imagine clogging your family's plumbing system - three times
the serviceman came out and told us there were "major" blockages. my parents spent a lot of time, energy and money trying to figure out why these were happening more and more frequently...and it was me.
you'd be surprised that public restrooms can get clogged from this too - work, school, etc.
damn, do they know its you?
i just put 2 and 2 together and realized that maybe that's the reason ours has done the same.
my mom once made a comment saying "...and it's only ours that has this problem."
i thought of it but figured that there was no way that could be the reason.
how does it clog it?
the sun comes out
I want to be able to have confidence in singign again. It is my life and as a kid its all i ever cared about, all i everw wanted to do
now all i think about is binging/purging
and my voice is fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffucked
wanna see whats shakin in the real world
i used to love to sing and was well know for my ability. now i don't have the confidence or the joy i used to have when it comes to singing. not to mention the quality of my voice has been affected.
because it makes me feel shameful and worthless
because i end up wasting my parents well-earned money
because it has messed up my heart and digestive system
because worrying about my weight and calories have consumed my life to the point where i cant concentrate or sleep
because i cant deal with my life
because i want to be happy
i want to live my life the way that life should be lived
i want to enjoy being in this body that God gave me
i want to enjoy eating and be able to eat for nourishment AND pleasure instead of always abusing it
i'm sick of hiding behind this thing instead of being a part of the world.
Wow...that is exactly how i feel.
good reasons to get better :)
-Ashley
"i'm sick of hiding behind this thing instead of being a part of the world"
that is what i have been thinking about lately. what if i took off the mask of the eating disorder? what would it be like? i want to live an authentic life. not a false one where i pretend everything is okay but when i am alone it is not...
Because all the good things in my life go unnoticed because they are shadowed by bulimia. I cannot appreciate anything anymore and feel like I am never happy. No matter what I accomplish I am not proud of myself because overall I am a failure.
Because I have become an compulsive liar, to the point where I don't feel guilty about it anymore.
Because I am indifferent to my family. I treat them as if they are dispensable and unimportant to my life.
I want to be able to have a healthy relationship with my family. I don't want to feel like I am acting like a horrible human being than no one, including myself, could love.
I want to be able to love myself.
<3 Be who you want to be, not who you think you are.
I think this is a productive topic. Bulimia has brought out many ugly aspects of my personality. Such as dishonesty around money,it brought out greed. Self centeredness, self seeking, never satisfied/discontent, the list goes on. Sometimes I wonder if those character defects cause me to be sick in the first place. EITHER WAY, a big part of my recovery is practicing reversing those behaviors. Like being more honest,more giving,selfless. That to me is more powerful than holding back from acting out symptomatically. In short- TO BE A BETTER,MORE LOVING AND EMOTIONALLY AVAILABLE,STRONGER AND FREE PERSON.
is so that I can be healthy enough to have and raise a child, and be able to tell that child to live a happy, positive and healthy life without being a hypocrite. Also to save my teeth - I love my beautiful smile, and I am so very lucky to still have all of them!
Because when I'm older and reminiscing about my high school years, I don't want to regret wasting them on this.
Because the boy I am completely in love with, my best friend, likes girls with some "meat" on them. I think I scare him.
My oldest sister is a beautiful, successful, confident 28-year-old living in Brooklyn with her husband; she manages to eat when she's hungry, stop when she's full and she looks great. She eats to live, but she eats a good, variety of foods. She's great. I can be like her.
I can't have this problem when I get to college.
People are starting to question the marks on my hands.
bulimia takes away the joys of life.
I cant see how this will ever stop - i never thought this would actually become part of my life - now 6 years down the line here i am on this forum trying to sort this mess out!! i feel like i am loosing my mind most of the time!!
I am tired of thinking of food and weight every single second of my life !!
:-) xx
this is going on my 6th year too! :( Im 22 (2009) how old are you? We can overcome this killing disease!
but just mostly because I want to.
My children and my husband need me....
I want to live......
1. My son! He means everything to me, he has brought more love, joy, and meaning to my life then I EVER thought possible and he deserves to have a happy healthy mommy.
2.Myself: I want to look in the mirror and smile again. I want to feel completly confident from the inside out. I want learn how to live life again with out counting and over analyzing every calorie, gram of fat and carb that I think about putting in my body. I want to wake up in the morning and not have the first thing I think about be getting to the scale to make sure I didnt gain any weight and go to bed with out worrying about getting up and being afraid to get on scale. But mostly I just want to be free to really enjoy living my life with my amazing family.
because, i wat to be able to look in the mirror
i wantto love taekwond
i wantto smile a true smile rather than a fake one
dont want to lie
i don\t want to waste
i want to live again
i dont want to die
i wantmy parents to be proud
i want to go to nationals
i dont want to be scared
i wantto love people
and not hate myself
this list goes on forever and ever but it doesn't make it any easier to stop, in fact oi dont think ill ever be able to but atleast thanx to this sitre im not completely alone
xox-katie-xox, Together we will win this battle. <3
Katie i think its so sad to hear that you feel you will never beat this disease !!
I think your probably alot strong than you realise, it wont be easy but you cant go into trying to beat this with the attitude that you wont .. you need to be positive and think you can beat this.. i know its easier said than done..
Im starting to think of this disease as a monster living inside of me and everytime i get the urge to purge i try and push this monster back down.. not letting it win or take control of me anymore !!
I never realised that beating this would be as hard as this.. and im only 2 day's into it.. and iv already had a slip up with laxertives..
Im trying to regain a healthy eating routine again.. just eating healthy light/small things for lunch and then a bigger but healthy meal for tea and thats it.. I have been trying to keep busy in the evenings so i dont think about food !!
Have you tried anything to help you get over this??
If you wanna chat more just say and il send u my email address??
xxxxx
:-) xx
Because it is f*cking disgusting to purge into a plastic grocery bag in the basement so no one can hear you. Not to mention INSANE.
Ive taken empty containers into my room so i wouldn't be confronted about being in the toilet so long. It does feel very shameful and extreme but don't feel guilty about it. Guilt will always take us back to square one.
nay
Because it's neurotic that I know every one-seater public restroom from work to home.
because i want to experience my life fully.
Because I hate nervously laughing when other people talk about bulimia.
I hate being on edge all the time and crying every day for stupid reasons.
BECause it HURTS!!!!
dee, horsebackgirl
I want to live a life of authenticity - me for me, faults and imperfections to be celebrated - no more self depricating thoughts! I teach my students every day to have a sense of humor about life...I think that each one of them is SO beautiful...I need to remind myself of these same things.
Because it is ruining my life. I get so angry at my boyfriend because I am so insecure. I am moody, judgemental, critical, and sensitive and I hate myself to the point that I don't know how to feel love. It has stopped me from doing so many things, not to mention the extreme amounts of money and time wasted...for WHAT???? Bad skin, stomach bloat, weak teeth...just imagine if I had used all that energy for something else, something valuable and productive and worthwhile..........
Binge/purging is lonely, and scary, and anxious-making to the extreme...accomplishes nothing positive...sets me back and isolates me further...
When will I realize that the best way to punish myself is to constantly seek perfection?
- bulimia just makes you feel worse not better
- you destroy your relationship with other people
- you destroy your health
- bulimia can lead to serius anemia, depression, etc
reasons to quit:
to feel alive.
to let go of fear, embarrasment, and guilt- like i should be thrown in jail and be treated like crap because i'm living an ugly secret.
to avoid crossing someones path in public, in the midst of the bulimia and play act.
to have another experience and try something new...this is nothing but self-destruction, promising misery.
to attract people who honor and love me, because when i'm abusing myself i attract abusive people. logical.
to get back into life, with real relationships.
to regain the will to care, to live, to laugh, to love, to learn, to believe and hope and dream and celebrate.
to celebrate.
when the sickness takes over, nothing else is important. well i say NO to bulimia, because that monster will not win. my soul won't back down.
I like what you wrote... To feel alive! Vomiting doesn't make me feel alive, it wastes my time! Time I could be investing on myself positively.
Yes, abusing myself, because of low self-esteem, will only attract people who hurt us. We let them hurt us, because we hurt ourselves first. Deep down, we feel we're lacking something... We put ourselves down.
Regaining control of my life, so I can focus on other areas of my life and stop procrastinating!
Bulimia = the devil
my reasons are:
- to stop being depressed
- to stop obsessing over weight
- eat and act like a normal person
- resume my previous lifestyle
- to feel happy again
It's simply not worth it.
We only have one life. One set of about 80 years to live on this earth and at the rate I'm going, I'll probably be dead a lot sooner then that.
My reasons:
I'm sick of feeling like a horrible person.
I'm sick of lying to my friends/family/boyfriend.
I'm sick of throwing up in the bathroom at work, it's disgusting.
I'm sick of not having a social life.
I'm sick of knowing that I've wasted the last 7 years of my life with my head in the shitter, literally.
I'm sick of having chest pains, fainting, and being afraid that I might have a heart attack at the age of 21.
I'm just sick.
1- It's robbing me of quality time with my kids and family because I'm so obsessed with b&p
2- It's expensive
3- It's making me feel down, anxious and angry
4- I have to take prilosec everyday because I have such bad reflux/heartburn
5- I have gained weight over the years
6- I want to feel healthy and free from the nasty disease
7- I want to see my children graduate from college and get married
8- I want to see my grandchildren grow up someday
9- I am a nurse and I KNOW what it's doing to my body
10- I just want my time and life back.
My reason to get healthy is my two-year-old daughter. Not only do I want her to grow up to be a healthy woman, but if I die because of bulimia, there is no one else to care for her and she'd be orphaned. We're all we have. It's a very startling thought that keeps me motivated to quit. I won't let bulimia ruin both of our lives.
because:
i hate hiding from friends and family
i want to be a healthy role model (i'm a med student and KNOW better)
i want to start dancing again and need the energy!!
i'm really embarassed to go to the dentist
because my mom was bulimic and has major food issues to this day
i want to act like a NORMAL person around food
i'm tired of feeling depressed and trapped
i became bulimic my sophmore year in college even though i was at a perfect weight. now i've gained and lost the same 15 pounds more times than i can count, ruined my digestive system, flushed hundreds of dollars down the toilet (literally), am too tired/unmotivated to exerecise, and always worried about the next time i lose control. the first day i threw up i thought i discovered an awesome secret to staying thin. looking back, i know that was the worst day of my life. i can't wait to be done with b/p and finally get my life back!!!
The list goes on and on for reasons to stop. I can only wonder why i continue. Its like a lover that draws you in with warm promises of happiness and fullfillment. You wrap yourself in its embrace untill it consumes you. By the time you realize its a trap you are completely lost and alone. You find that your lover is a wolf in sheeps clothing. Abusive and controlling. It breaks you down a little at a time until the real you is no longer evident. It keeps you hanging on with promises of a better tommorrow. It lies and schemes and we believe. (Its time to kick it out and find and love our selves.)
I want to have kids one day...and let my parents see their grandchildren. I want my father to walk me down the isle. I want my boyfriend to not feel pushed away. I want the shameful feelings to go away and the confidence to regain.
I want to have MORE money to do things rather than hinder it for bulimia. I want to motivate someone who is dealing with an eating disorder and be a role model to get help.
I want to stop feeling like a disappointment and start feeling a sense of self worth.
I want to be open and honest...and NOT throw up or have constant vomiting thoughts.
I want to smile and actually feel the happiness inside.
I want MY identity back...not the bulimia's identity!
Beacause:
-I want to have more then just one or two binge free days a week, I want to be free and know what life is without this disorder
-Not waste money on binge food
-Feel healthy, help my acid reflux
-be happier, not holding this heavy burden of a secret
-loving life
-be able to live to my best ability and give everything my all
-give over this burden to God
-Not let it get in the way of my relationships
-date because I can, and not let bulimia tell me I`m fat
-be the true Emily, not the one that Bulimia causes me to be
-be able to write poetry again and have an unclouded mind with be binge / restriction free
-Emi- love life, and be strong
b/c:
-i can envision a life where i'm working on other things that i actually care about instead of feeling drained all the time
-regain my personality, hobbies, relationships
-at 18, i have soooo much to live for and look forward to
-feeling that childlike happiness again- i didn't care what i looked like or thought about what i could or couldn't have, i just lived!!
**Brooke
I wan't to quit because bulimia:
1. is expensive
2. destroys my self-image
3. makes me self-concious and egocentric
4. makes me rather stay home than go out with friends
5. makes me say no to dates because i feel fat
6. makes me not enjoy sex fully, because i can't stop thinking about how fat and disgusting i must seem to him
7. makes me afraid of being home alone, because i'm afraid i'll lose control and start b/p
8. makes me gain weight
9. makes me unfocused on my studies
10. makes me forget to sing
11. makes me embarressed and dissapointed in myself
12. makes me scared of the future
I tried to quit for others - for my kids' sake, to save my marriage, to make loved ones relieved. Unfortunately, my bulimia was stronger than those desires. At this point, I am trying to find a sense of self-love and acceptance. Not easy. But I pretend that I already feel the love and hope it will come. This old body of mine has done some amazing things, in spite of the horrible treatment I've given it. I want to finally acknowledge how wonderful my body is and care for it with love.
Also, because food can be fun again and eating could be wonderful and I'm missing out on that!
- Lisa
Fall down seven times, stand up eight.
living with bulimia is like walking through life with my eyes closed. Instead of experiencing life i feel as though I'm missing out on so much. I want my life back.
With pain we can grow
Into who we want to be
And only when were beaten down
Can we find our identity
because i want to be proud of myself...
my front tooth has fallen out :(
I want to build an honest and genuine relationship with my husband. Bulimia makes me miserable. I'm more concerned about what and when I eat rather than loving my family. I want to be free of this distorted thinking!!! I feel like I'm wasting precious years on this stupid ED. I'm very ashamed of myself.
1. Bulimia made me feel like hell - like I'd been run over by a mac truck
2. Stomach problems - too much acid, stomach pain
3. Damage to teeth - acid wear & yellowing
4. Swollen face after multiple purges
5. Distancing from family & friends - being a bulimic is a LONELY life
6. Weight gain due to binging - leaving me feeling sluggish
7. no self-esteem - no confidence
8. The negative thoughts about myself - "Never good enough..."
9. Electrolyte imbalance
10. Lack of self-trust around food
11. Shame about the behavior
12. Depression (I admit other factors than bulimia - but it made it worse)
13. The addictive quality of the disease
And the reasons could go on, but I think it's clear - there are SO MANY reasons to stop. Even looking at this list makes me feel better about my journey to recovery
The best way out is always through. ~Robert Frost
1. I miss who I used to be
2. My children get shafted because I'm too busy b/p
3. I have built walls up in fear of friends/family finding out, now I feel as though I have noone
4. My stomach always hurts
5. The gas is horrendous
6. I break out all around my
7. I'm obsessed and superficial
8. I'm always preoccupied with me and miss out on life
9. I always feel ashamed
10. I waste a ridiculous amount of food=money
11. I miss out on eating dinner with my family because I want to eat alone and enjoy every bite
12. I turn into some crazy person when going through the b/p cycle. I gross myself out
I've done everything in my life with the idea of what others will think of it. I never found out who I am and when I allow myself to cry I don't even know why I'm doing it. I am so emotionally disconnected that I walk around looking at everything like I'm outside of my body. When I catch sight of myself in the mirror or a store window, I think that the person there is beautiful, until I recognize that its me and it becomes ugly and not good enough. I am tired of the pain, the shame and the secrecy. I am tired of swallowing my anger. I am tired of the resentment against other women and the anxiety of day-to-day life. Nobody deserves to feel this way. I want to do this for myself, for once. I want to be happy.
Here she is in color but I will use the past tense, as I have announced to her that her game is over ( http://graceismyname.wordpress.com/2009/08/12/cry/ ):
1. She made me think about food 24/7
2. She made me starve, binge, purge
3. She made me stay home when friends are having BBQs
4. She made me spend houndreds of dollar each month on food (that I would waste)
5. She made me steal food
6. She made me weak
7. She made me unbeautiful
8. She made me lose faith in myself
9. She made me resistent to true emotions and feelings
10. She made me lack my true values and morals
11. She made me not to be myself
12. She made me happy for only seconds
13. She made me lose control
14. She made me lose him
15. She made me cry
16. She made me faint at home, at work, at the gym
17. She wrecked me
(could go on forever...)
BUT I AM READY TO FIGHT HER! FOREVER!!
Grace
love this post!
bulimia is bad,my dad lives in the country side and after i sunday roast 1 time i said i was goin for a walk and vomited in a hedge and once when the bathroom was busy i vomited in a carrier bag then but it in the bins out side,how shameful is that....thats why i need to stop this ,its effectin my relationship wit b/f,always tierd,mood swings no energy.....
xxx
becky xx
For me the reason to quit is simple, I don't know who I am without the eating disorder. I have suffered from bulimia for five years and the most important relationship of my life has been shaped around hiding my eating disorder. After five years of hiding, I hid who I really was... and now I don't know who that is. But I am ready to find out.