I cannot believe I am back on this site. I read the book, read the stories yet still my mind convinced me that I knew better. I put my need for a certain body weight before my recovery. I listened to my "eating disorder thinking" instead of recovery thinking. So I am back where I started at the beginning. My ED has taken everything from me, I so want to get better but my mind wants to keep messing things up for me. My ED prevents me from asking others for support, so the first step in recovery is to ask for support and guidance from others out there.