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Music of Life27 » c8lin89 hey! how have you been doing? i just got back from vaca, 10 days purge free! makes me happy, idk if i will be able to keep it up now that i'm back i'm so much more tempted to bc its been so long. I totally understand the whole parents mentioning it, my mom has done that and its so awkward, like how do you respond to that even. How is being back at school now, are you doing better? let me know, xoxo 17 min ago |
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trixie_25 » Miss H well, i finally had a pink day on the calendar yesterday... it was tough, i binged & totally planned to purge but then i stopped myself. i feel so bloated & disgusting still the next morning :( but i know i gotta stop using purging as my back-up plan! how r u doing lady?? 39 min ago |
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firestorm » Miss H Darling!! How are you? I'm reaching out to people around me after a fully bad evening last night. So I'm making my rounds and spreading loooove. =D oxoxo <3 1 hour ago |
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firestorm » dark_blue ...I've been reading it and it's very good. Very. Something I'm forcing myself to do is just TALK. When I clam up bad things happen and I get worse, and end up hurting myself and inadvertently those I love. I'm fucking sick and tired of doing this. AH. MAKE THIS STOP. But I know that this is *my* battle. Only *I* can fight this battle. So. Here goes. Love you love you love youuuu! Rants are very worth it. =D <3 Hang tough warrior! 1 hour ago |
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firestorm » dark_blue ...I hate my new therapist. HATE. And I'm so anxious all the time, so I feel like I'm under a milllllion bricks and totally overwhelmed. I'm failing most of my classes, now, which just makes it worse. Idk, something here needs to change. I fell asleep on the couch in my Major's office this morning as he was typing some work, and it's the most comfortable I've felt in a while. But then someone walked past the open door and scared the shit outta me. You know, I think we both need to rant to each other on a daily basis... Look up that book!! .... 1 hour ago |
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firestorm » dark_blue Aww, my lovely, I'm sorry to hear that. Sadly we both had shitty days. I'm back at day 1 after 15 clean days, I also tore up my leg. No stitches, so thats something. I can't sleep in my bed anymore (kinda scared, I think, of beds...) and I'm terrified of the dark and of open doors at my back. =\ I'm going to m psychiatrist on weds, hopefully he can get me on some good meds for sleep and the anxiety. But unfortunately my Major and Sergeant tell my that the flashbacks just need time and therapy, neither of which I feel like I have right now.... 1 hour ago |
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Featured Blog
What I learned during recovery
PLAN, PLAN, PLAN IN ADVANCE. Plan what you are going to eat during your day. What are you going to do if you are in a situation that triggers b/p. Thinking all the time about recovery is part of the eating disorder. I need to focus on the real life instead. Don’t trust yourself. If I know I always binge during an X situation (like being alone at home around 5pm), I need to go out at that time or find another activity. I am not strong enough to just be at home by myself and act normally. If I eat those cookies because I am feeling lonely they won’t make my friends appear. Trust yourself, and your body. Tell yourself you are able to do it. Tell yourself that you are not going to gain one pound because you ate a piece of cheesecake. God is an important part of my recovery If I eat tons of food, all the time, I will gain weight. I can’t have cheesecake and hamburger and fries everyday, in every meal, but I can have them once in a while. I purge not only because of my emotions, but it is an easy way to control my weight. I love food.
The information provided in this website is for information purposes only. The information on this website is NOT a substitute for proper diagnosis, treatment or the provision of advice by an appropriate health professional. Please refer to the full disclaimer and copyright. If you do think you might suffer from an eating disorder, it is important that you talk to your General Practitioner, as there are many physical complications that can arise from being at an unhealthily low weight or from losing weight very quickly, or from purging. We advise you to seek professional help with working on an eating disorder.
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i cant really do this because we dont really buy groceries. its nobodys fault. i buy my own groceries, fruits, cereal, veggies but i cant plan what im going to eat most of the time, i like the idea n im gonna try it but its kinda hard when most of the time we go to restaurants. i am eating, i have my healthy snacks n everytime i go out i ask for a salad or a soup. so thats how i plan things. i do some research on whats healthy n i ask for it.
its working for me, i think its a different kinda of meal plan.
*Ng*
ok I know its a positive thing but i cant help but feel its too much like a diet. i think im at the stage now where i've been able to get my mind away from a dieting mentality. i dont think half about food exept for when im hungry or its time to start making dinner.i have become more aware of when my body feels hungry or when its full.i do still binge at night time though.i feel i may be going backwards if i start living day to day on a food schedule.I think im most scared of not sticking to it aswell then i will feel hopeless.it would be good if i still wasnt consciously aware of how much i was eating and how irratically i was eating.i dont know.
*EmmaLouise*
yea i tried this..it lasted one day and then i was just like pfft im still hungry and then i ended up over eating...but the time management element is def helpful liek with the timed 3 meals and snackage?
all the times that i have planned and shopped for my meals then i become rigid and set myself up for failure. I believe in one day at a time or one meal at a time.
I cant do it! I cant plan a full meal without feeling guilty or overeating. If i want to do this i have someone who checks if i stick to it but im too afraid to show anyone. I cant believe im so scared..!
Hey Azula.. I understand how you feel. I wuld literally like someone to control my body and brain for me becase, even when its a salad, the moment i feel full I regret it and try to puke.. its really stupid but I wish we could help each other somehow.
Be Strong
HUGS
-xxx-
Iza
Yrs of pain... I love life too much to give up on myself!
i feel the exact same way ... i wish i had a partner in fighting this!
I feel good after making a meal plan for next week. Although I don't 100% trust myself to follow it as I am good at making excuses. I don't know whether it would be a good idea to share my meal plan with a friend or not. Whatever happens I will try my hardest not to beat myself up if I don't fully stick to it.