desperate,please help

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natascha
natascha's picture
desperate,please help

i feel so hopeless,helpless and full of selfhate and disgust.
every morning i try not to binge, but every day i do it again.how can i stop.
i am irritated and confused and angry most of the day and occupied with loosing weight.
i feel so sad and exhausted,total relapse.where can i start again?
please talk with me.
thank you

Natascha

giraffelaura
giraffelaura's picture
I think it's really one step

I think it's really one step at a time. You need to forget about weight loss. You want to recover to stop bingeing, not to lose weight. You want to stop because bingeing is ruining your life, it is making you depressed, hopeless, in despair, out of control, frustrated, despondent, overwhelmed.

Weight loss or gain - don't acknowledge it. The feeling of beating binge urges will totally fill you with hope, joy and excitement that it will cancel out that great need to lose weight.

And from what I am told, weight loss will naturally follow months down the line anyway!

I believe in you. You CAN do this. It is so hard, so consuming, but there is light at the end of the tunnel. Be kind to yourself, okay you have had a run of several days of bingeing, but the next hour is a new hour, so are the hours following that, and so is the day following today and this evening.

Blips are normal part of recovery. I was only managing 2 or 3 days at a time before I binged again, but now I am on my 8th day binge purge free. SO I think gradually, you push those parameters a bit further each time the more skillfull you become at resisting those primal brain urges.

Keep going, you're doing great

Be still and know that I am God

natascha
natascha's picture
thank you so much!!! I am so

thank you so much!!!
I am so happy for you that you can follow your path to more freedom.
thank you for your love and kindness!
Natascha

Natascha

natascha
natascha's picture
P.S> How did you manage to

P.S>

How did you manage to stay on track 8 days without binge purge?
I did 8 days one week ago and managed through eating every 2,5hours and not restricting,sometimes overeating.
Than gaining 10 pound in one week and a lot of emotional struggle,constipation and bloating-and I fell back.....

What keeps you going?

You are doing great,too!!!

Lots of hope and love,
Natascha

Natascha

giraffelaura
giraffelaura's picture
I really understand. I'm sort

I really understand.

I'm sort of in that place at the moment. I have put on weight, I feel bloated, I look pregnant! My tummy is so swollen and sore and I am constipated too.

I'm just repeating over and over to myself that the temporary pain is worth it for a much longer term glory and freedom.

How have things gone for you in the last 24 hours? I'm also eating very often. Sometimes I find eating every 3 hours guideline too long a time! I'm always thinking about food and my next meal and that is rather annoying me!

Trying to come up with ways I can occupy my mind for chunks at a time, like baking, crafting, gardening.

Thinking of you

Love Laura

Be still and know that I am God

Angel333
Angel333's picture
Your doing great by firstly

Your doing great by firstly acknowledging you have a problem and coming onto this site. That is the first step to recovery, admitting it and admitting you need support. this is the first stage of the rest of your life :)
Read the book, listen to the audios, read through the forums and blogs...we are all going or have gone through the same and are here to offer support. Letting go of numbers, weight, clothes size, ideal images etc is a priority. At this stage all you should be focusing on is structured eating and not binging and NOT purging...its tough and challenging and you will have your good days and bad but credit yourself for making a step towards recovery :)

Wishing you all the best in recovery

'We are each of us angels with only one wing, so we can only fly by embracing each other'

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