I am sorry that my first message on this forum is a sad one, but I felt that I just needed to write my worries and feelings and be heard (read) by someone else.
My name is Irene and I am Spanish. I have been battling with bulimia for 12 years now and when I found this programme I thought I had been blessed and had finally found the way.
I have just started, I mean, I started reading the book the 30th of December or so and immediately started to apply the estructured eating plan. I was just so happy for all the changes that came with it, as I spent the first ten days of this year free of purging and (almost) bingeing!! I contemplated a future free for bulimia for the first time in many years and was so amazed at the prospect :)
But now I feel like a loser again. I have started working night shifts for two days a week, which implies that the following day I wake up late, tired, and I would even add depressed. These mornings I really don't know what to do, I feel lost, a failure ( it is really hard for me to spend time doing nothing, and I wake up really unmotivated. Really have an issue with being home alone), and always end up bingeing and messing up my meals for the rest of the day.
It has happened to me again today, and I feel that I may not ever succeed, that it's not going to work, so I turn to you people in the hope you have been through this same situation and are now better and can give me any word of support or advice. On top of it I look at myself now and feel bloated, fat, and disgusted with my body :(
I hope you can help me and I thank you all for being there and listening (reading me) :) I really want this to work.