Getting Dumped During Recovery

4 posts / 0 new
Last post
whatseatingcj's picture
Getting Dumped During Recovery

For the past couple of months, I've been accused non-stop of being selfish and "all about ME ME ME" and for some reason, significant others can't get it through their heads that recovery is a selfish process. I have to worry about me for once, which is increasingly hard since I work in the healthcare profession. Co-dependence is definitely something I have to look out for. I had grown so attached to him that I followed his every move and did anything he wanted to and all of his friends became my friends. He'd stood by me for this first part of my recovery and drops the bomb on me yesterday that he seriously doesn't see us working out because all I care about is me. It's been a year and five months and you can just walk out like that? I know I'm not as sensitive as you wish I was, but really?

I still haven't cried. I'm too stressed with school and all of this recovery (yesterday was my 3 week mark purge-free) stuff, that I haven't even been able to fully grasp what has just happened. My boyfriend (also my best friend) just left me, just like that, POOF. He won't even text/call me back just to talk and get closure. He's finished and I'm starting to realize maybe I have been for a long time, grown enough in my recovery to outgrow him? It happens all the time in any addiction recovery process.

I can't cry...but I can't eat either. I don't have an appetite and I don't really want to face anybody right now. I don't want to talk, I just want to get my school work done and go to sleep to just wake up to a lonely mess tomorrow. I'm so terrified of going at this alone. What if I can't? What if I am just going to be all alone forever because I can't give up being miss independent or I never fully recover?


Poppet's picture
Hi Hun I can totally relate

Hi Hun
I can totally relate to where you are coming form. Relationships can be hard. I have had my heart hurt in recovery and its not nice... But at the same time I also can now see that it was important for me to spend time on my own, learning to love myself single. And to put my recovery first.
Good luck - give yourself some time and love to heal


Jumper's picture
Yes! Poppet has said it well.

Yes! Poppet has said it well. Keep up the recovery and self love follows!


jamie_16's picture
I can relate to this

I can relate to this situation. I have been struggling with bulimia for also as long as I have been dating my boyfriend (41/2years). We have had our ups and downs but he has always been there and supported me, However I don't think that he fully understands what I go through mentally and physically. I try to explain it to him but I don't know... Um I am to the point where I don't feel Iam fit to be in a relationship. We argue all the time and say hurtful things to each other. Its a constant battle with my mood swings and anxiety. I feel I give nothing positive to our relationship. I am always consumed and stressed with school and I take most of my frustration out on my boyfriend. I can be mean to him without even realizing ( perfectionism related). Its not fair to him and I want him to be happy. I am a totally different person than I use to. I have no idea what to do. I really want to leave him. I think its for the best. I love him so much and planned a future together but this bulimia and all its 'baggage' is tearing my apart. I don't want to put him through it anymore. Any advise?? Please

Join the Recovery Program & Support Community. Tell me more






The information provided in this website is for information purposes only. The information on this website is NOT a substitute for proper diagnosis, treatment or the provision of advice by an appropriate health professional. Please refer to the full disclaimer and copyright. If you do think you might suffer from an eating disorder, it is important that you talk to your General Practitioner, as there are many physical complications that can arise from being at an unhealthily low weight or from losing weight very quickly, or from purging. We advise you to seek professional help with working on an eating disorder.


Copyright © 2013. All rights reserved.