I'm unfortunately back

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tomsgirl
tomsgirl's picture
I'm unfortunately back

I thought I was recovered. It was about 10months with out purging although the binge was still ensue once in a while. Now, I have been binging and purging again. I don't know what started it. It's been about 6months. It feels like it came back with a vengeance. Almost worse than before. I haven't reached out until now because I almost didn't want to try to stop. But, I know I need to and I know this site is what saved me before. I can admit right now that I do need help and it is time to heal. I purged yesterday afternoon but, today is a new day. Each day offers new hope.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

rebeccabot
rebeccabot's picture
Back to the start? It should

Back to the start? It should be much easier for you if you've had recovery before - so get back on that horse! Do you have any idea why/how the relapse happened?

x

tomsgirl
tomsgirl's picture
I hope it will be easier in

I hope it will be easier in the end. So far, I have seemed to be worse in that I hadn't even felt the will to attempt to recover. I just wanted to eat what ever I wanted and not care. What started it all again? I wish I could answer that. I know my triggers. Pms, exhaustion, emotional stress eating then freaking out about what I ate because I am a perfectionist but I am human and therefore imperfect.

Just knowing that I declared that I needed to recover here was enough to stop a binge this afternoon and recognize that what I was really craving was sleep. It was really encouraging to have one win. The rest of this day was back to structured eating.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

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