Night time binges... why cant I stop Bully MIa from screaming at me in the night?

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hayls's picture
Night time binges... why cant I stop Bully MIa from screaming at me in the night?

I am struggling with this area of my life, soooo much.

I have taken time off from work and my day time binges have decreased to nil. I know that stress leads me to binge on sweets to get myself away from the feeling of stress, boredom and anxiety.

But I can not remove my self from sleep! I

find that I binge and go back into the cycle right before I am supposed to sleep.

The moment when the day has finally come to an end. IT FEELS SO FINAL AND I FEEL SO VUNERABLE.

No TV or other people around to distract me - just me and my mind.. and there she is.. Bully Mia.. back in full force telling me to go eat and purge.

I wish I could stop it! I wake up in the morning and feel as if I have a hangover and I havent drunk alcholol for 2 years or more.

I wish I could stop it.

I prayed whilst I was in the cycle. last night.

After such a good day with the food, eating healthy meals.. I prayed and my boyfriend messaged me a picutre of himself with a fish he had caught during a camping weekend. The text came at 11:30 while my head was in the fridge... he had no clue he was a sign that God was watching me and caring for me even whilst I was in the painful shame cycle of B+P...

I carried on and now I have no food in the fridge. I have faith that God can help.. and sharing this on here maybe it can help to.. I just dont know how to stop it.

It is emotional eating.. but I can not seem to get it into my head that it wont help.. only hurt.

Any suggestions.. or maybe anyone else have this same problem so I dont feel so crazy?

Thanks for reading this far.
With love...

Lea8624's picture
I had a lot of trouble with

I had a lot of trouble with the night time binges too. Here are some things that have helped me stay strong.

--allow for a snack before bed. When i was dieting I thought it was bad to eat before bed. I now know this is not true and I almost always have a healthy snack (fruit, nuts, crackers, whatever) before bed. Or f I am really craving something like ice cream or cookies I will have a little.

--Fool yourself:: When I am stuck in a relapse, and b/p every night and can't seem to get back into recovery mode, I will try and trick myself. I will say OK...just one night no bunging. I can binge tomorrow if I want, just not tonight, I can at least control myself for one night. And then once I make it through one night I usually think WOW I did it, which means I can do it again!

I know that avoiding the night time binges is reallly uncomfortable and you feel like you need it, but try and see if you can replace it with another activity. Listen to music while falling asleep.

I know you can do it...and congrats on getting rid of most of your daytime is still huge progress that you should be proud of. Just take it one step at a time.

The walls we build around us
to keep out the sadness
also keep out the joy.

Jim Rohn

hayls's picture
Thank you for your support

Thank you for your support and suggestions.

I am learning day by day and trying out what has worked for others.. so will try out simple the simple allow a snack before bedtime.. I

congrats on your 6months.... Really inspirational. I hope to have what you have some day.

Big hug,

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