Topic: This is stupid

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bulimic slave
bulimic slave's picture
Topic: This is stupid

My mom woke up to make food this morning, but the fridge was empty. She came to me and asked me why i eat so much and still lose weight, ARE YOU ON DRUGS...DO YOU NEED A PSYCHOLOGIST? she asked me. I got angry and told her to leave me alone cause i'm sleeping. I got thinking, i'd rather tell her that i'm smoking weed than to tell her i have mia. I want to stop this, but i dont want my mom to find out and hate me. What to do...what to do

The mirror does not see the person inside

lea26
lea26's picture
know how u feel

I know exactly how u feel! my mom use to wonder where all the food went in the house, and use to blame other people beacuse she thought i was such a health finatic. i felt bad about it, and i wanted to tell her. I kept it a secret for 3 years...and finally broke down on sunday! she always knew i had i funny relationship with food, and she guessed it. i didnt want to tell her bc i thought she would hate me, or be ashamed of me, but i she wasnt at all. she understood (she had the same problem too!-which i didnt know) she suports me and asks me how im doing everyday. but even if i do binge now, im still scared to tell her, but i know i should. all im saying is that u should tell her. it will feel like a very large burden is off ur shoulders.

*Lea

bulimic slave
bulimic slave's picture
I'm scared

I'm so scared of my mom. She's so perfect and holy, she'd send my to a psychiatric ward, trust me, i know her. I've had urges to tell her than she says something to make me change my mind. At least your mom went through this and understands what you going through, my mom would judge me, slap me, and judge me again

The mirror does not see the person inside

Ali
Ali's picture
It can be difficult telling someone

I understand how difficult it is to tell anyone; some people are more understanding than others. It might be easier to write a letter. Explain that there are millions of people all over the world who have bulimia.

It can also be useful to let others know the following:

"There is no evidence available to support the assertion that eating disorders are a consequence of a mental illness"! For more information about this click here: Mandometer

Good luck!

Ali Kerr
Recovery is so very very possible!

Footy
Footy's picture
my parents see me eat alot at

my parents see me eat alot at night, but i tell them its becuase I havent eaten all day. All the junk food is always devoured by me haha, and when something's gone I'm always caught... but they still don't know... or do they I dont know?

MarissaM
MarissaM's picture
I know what you mean and how

I know what you mean and how you feel. My dad would always call me a pig when I got up for a second bowl of cereal. Then I would get up set and end up eating more. I hate it.

You are strong and can make it through.

arielariana
arielariana's picture
I feel so bad hearing this.

I feel so bad hearing this. Some of you have jerk parents, some maybe understand, but I, who am I so close to my dad, and who accepts me 100%, would be more at ease telling me I slept with a guy then I've been purging it. I'm lucky I don't live at home and have to deal w/ them noticing food gone, but the bottom line is it makes you feel totally ashamed to have to tell someone; it's just embarrassing. I'm open about all my problems, but only one person on this earth knows I'm a bulimic. Maybe cuz I feel so not-human when I'm doing it.....

At any rate, God help you with dealing with family. Ultimatley though, I'd do everything possible to le tonly those who are utterly accepting know, and try to cover up the rest for anyone else.

--Lisa

nestor
nestor's picture
My family never says anything

My family never says anything when there's tons of food missing which I hate because I'm not scared to keep doing it. I finally told my mom that she needs to call me out on my behavior if she ever thinks I'm going to stop. My family won't say anything but I know they know because they hide food from me . I've found snacks and food in the most random places and I know it's because they're trying to hide it. What I don't understand is that they're letting this happen in front of them but instead of confronting me they just hide stuff and hope for the best.

just hold my hand i think that would help.

beYOUtiful
beYOUtiful's picture
On a hospital bed in the ER,

On a hospital bed in the ER, at 2 AM, my mom's reaction to my disclosure that I was bulimic went something like this: "What a waste of food!" Afterward, she would joke about the whole thing: "Be sure to save me a piece of pie! (giggle)" A lot of people fail to grasp the complexity of eating disorders...even some of our loved ones. It is very frustrating...

anni
anni's picture
So sad to read... :(

So sad to read... :(

She runs through the night as if nobody cares
She screams and she cries and ignores all the stares

scarlet dahlia
scarlet dahlia's picture
Yep. I have never told my

Yep. I have never told my parents straight up. But my mother knew I was bulimic when I was 15 because she could hear me in the bathroom, no matter how quiet I tried to be. That was back when I still had to force myself to vomit (now it's just a reflex, ew). Instead of simply asking me about it and expressing concern, she'd accuse loudly and blame and scream and yell and threaten, always inviting my father in on it. I'm telling you, old Italians are LOUD and very guilt-oriented people.

It is the animate earth that speaks. Human speech is but a part of that vaster discourse. --David Abram, "Spell of the Sensuous"

sisiromy
sisiromy's picture
My dad, when he learnt it, he

My dad, when he learnt it, he said "you shouldn't purge it's a wasteof money".... like if I cared. But globally i'm lucky to have nice parents.

Walker
Walker's picture
I first told my mom when I

I first told my mom when I was 15, just at the beginning of my bulimia, I wrote her a letter. She read it and came to me next morning sayin: "You are sooo stupid!! Now just stop that!!"
End of story. At least for some years. Later on with the help of a psychiatrist she learnt it was not a choice for me, and she learnt what bulimia was about. She is now the most supporting person around me and i speak out clear about my binges and vomit. Its not that im not ashamed, I am, but I have realized that dennying it wont make any better. First of all I need to not be afraid to look at my self and at my disease, I need to accept it in order to be able to change it and vanish it from my life.
Just think of this: she is the person who probably cares more about you, and even if at the beginning she doesnt want to know or to accept it SHE IS INSIDE OF THIS PICTURE, this is her reality as well. Sooner or later she will have to deal with it, so just ask yourself, is it really better to postpone it??
This is a hard step, but keep in mind it will eventually be a relief. And dont panic if at first she shouts and cries, that will also pass...
Big hug and all my support to you!
Walker

Walker

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