Weight issues and questions

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Luni
Luni's picture
Weight issues and questions

It's been 11 months since I stopped the b-p cycle. I haven't lost any of the weight I gained. (gained about 4kg) ... I feel great for not being trapped in the cycle but I can't accept my body like this. I am short, I am 5'2 and look so overweight. I have even tried therapy to try to accept my body but I can't. I went shopping yesterday and cried in the dressing room because of how horrible I felt. I feel really depressed and confused. I no longer restrict or skip meals, I eat less than a lot of my friends and still, I am the heaviest (which just makes everything so much worse), I eat completely healthy and excersise 3 to 4 times a week. Why am I not loosing any weight? It's been a year, and yes I have a thyroid issue, but I know people who are hypothyroid and are able to lose weight. Have I completely messed up my metabolism that I am no longer capable of losing weight no matter what? I know being recovered means never to have to diet again, but I am not dieting, I am eating healthy and excersising and nothing is happening. I can't seem to accept my body no matter what I do, and I am always having thoughts (since purging is no longer an option for me) about having a liposuction or some sort of beauty treatment. Is this normal? can someone who ahs gone through the same please help me, a coach perhaps????

Luni

freakyblonde88
freakyblonde88's picture
Dear Luni. Firstly I want to

Dear Luni.

Firstly I want to reach out and give you a big hug, as I've been in your shoes (or close at least).
I'm sorry you feel this way about yourself and your body, but let me ask you some things that I thought about when stepping over the threshold of recovery:

-What are four kgs in the great scheme of things?
-Why would you be "better" 4 kgs lighter?
- What is it that makes it more appealing?
- Why doesn't recovery feel like reward enough?
- Is the desire to weigh 4 kgs less realistic?
- Is it even logical for me to think about weight loss when my life is actually what is at stake?

Just think about it, 4 kgs may seem like a lot to you, but I can almost promise you, that no one who sees you, thinks that these few kgs define you. And they shouldn't. You are strong and amazing, you've broken out of the b/p cycle an decided to put your life first.
And your life and happiness should definitely come before some skinny ideal of what a woman's body should look like.

One thing that caught my attention was you said you eat the least of all your friends: Well your body may still be hanging on to nutrients, make sure you are eating healthy foods so your body is getting what it needs and doesn't need to cling to the "extras" so to speak.
LESS FOOD Doesn't not equal WEIGHT LOSS. I have in fact found the contrary. Since my recovery 2,5 yrs ago, I have weighed the exact same, (swaying 1 kg under over). I don't own a scale. I weigh myself every few months when I visit my in-laws, since they have one. And the scale doesn't define me, It's tough, I know it is, especially when we hang on to a goal or desire that seems to never become our reality. But my suggestion is "STOP WEIGHING YOURSELF" altogether. Just throw that scale out the window, give it to someone else or whatever you have to do. The scale is NOT your friend.

Focus on: Health, Happiness, life, experiencing things, trying new things, enjoying food, movement, the strength your body has to offer, and shopping for clothes that is YOUR SIZE, not some ideal.

Because the truth is: There is no Ideal, there is no perfect barbie. There is just you, and when you let yourself shine through then you are as perfect as you'll ever be.

Sorry for the long rant, hope it helps you somehow.
*Hugs*

Life is too short to not be happy

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